How to Support Someone Who is Struggling With Their Relationship to Food and Body
Knowing how to support someone who is struggling with their relationship to food and body can feel overwhelming. Whether it is a friend, partner, child, or family member, you may notice changes in their eating habits, increased anxiety around meals, negative comments about their body, or difficulty navigating social situations.
You may want to help, but feel unsure of what to say or how to approach the conversation. The most important thing to remember is that support does not mean having all of the answers. Often, it starts with creating a space where someone feels heard, understood, and accepted without judgement.
- Understand That Struggling With Food and Body is Not Always Visible
Someone does not need to have a diagnosed eating disorder to experience difficulties with food or body image. They may struggle with food-related anxiety, guilt after eating, rigid food rules, fear of certain foods, body dissatisfaction, or feeling overwhelmed during meals. These experiences can affect individuals regardless of age, gender, and body size.
It is also important to recognize that these struggles are not simply about food. They can be influenced by emotion, stress, past experiences, social influence, and many other factors.
Rather than making assumptions about what someone is experiencing, approach them with curiosity and compassion.
- Be Mindful About Comments in Regards to Food And Body
Comments that seem harmless can sometimes have a greater impact than intended, especially for someone who is already experiencing food- and body-related anxiety.
Some examples include:
- “Are you really going to eat all of that?”
- “You look so healthy!”
- “You don’t need to eat that!”
- “I wish I had your willpower!”
- “You look so much better!”
Even compliments about weight changes or eating habits can reinforce the idea that someone’s body or food choices are being evaluated or tied to their personal worth. Instead, try shifting the conversation away from appearance and food choices. Focus on the person rather than how they look or what they are eating.
- Focus on What You Can Say Instead
You do not need to find the perfect words. Showing someone you are willing to listen without judgement can make a meaningful difference.
Consider using supportive statements such as:
- “I’m here if you want to talk.”
- “You don’t have to figure everything out on your own.”
- “How can I best support you right now?”
- “I care about how you’re feeling.”
- “Would it help if we did this together?”
It’s important to allow someone to share their feelings when they feel ready. Avoid pushing them to talk or immediately try to fix the situation. Sometimes, listening is one of the most helpful things you can do.
- Create a Supportive Environment Around Food
For someone who is struggling with their relationship with food, everyday situations involving meals can feel stressful. Small changes at home or during mealtimes can help create a more comfortable environment.
Some examples include:
- Avoid labeling foods as “good”, “bad”, “clean” or “cheat”.
- Avoid commenting on the amount someone is eating.
- Try to keep conversations at the table focused on topics other than food, calories/macros or body size.
- Make shared meals feel relaxed rather than pressured.
- Respect that certain meals or situations may feel more challenging than others.
Remember, supporting someone does not mean monitoring their food intake or taking responsibility for what they eat. Try creating an environment where they feel safe and supported.
- Know When to Encourage Professional Support
While friends and family play an important role, they do not need to navigate these challenges alone. If someone is experiencing anxiety or guilt around food, experiencing distress about their body, or having difficulty maintaining regular eating habits, additional support from a professional may help.
A dietitian who specializes in eating disorders and disordered eating can help someone work towards a more peaceful relationship with food through individualized nutrition care. Depending on an individual’s needs, support may also include a physician, therapist, or other members of a collaborative team.
You can offer to help someone find resources, attend an appointment with them, or simply remind them that asking for help is okay.
- Remember That Progress Does Not Happen Overnight
Changing someone’s relationship with food and body takes time. There may be difficult days, uncomfortable conversations, and challenging situations along the way.
Try to avoid measuring progress based on appearance, weight, or how much someone eats during a meal. Instead, recognize the importance of feeling more comfortable around food, having less anxiety during meals, and developing more flexibility around food choices.
Sometimes the most meaningful support is showing up, listening, and creating a safe environment for them.
How Van Dusen Nutrition Can Help
At Van Dusen Nutrition, we recognize everyone’s relationship with food and body is different. Our team provides compassionate, personalized nutrition support for children, adolescents, and adults, navigating eating disorders, disordered eating, body image concerns and more.
Through an individualized and collaborative approach, we work alongside clients and their support systems to help them build a more positive and sustainable relationship with food and body. We offer intensive treatment plans through our STEP® levels of care, as well as adjunct services including Therapeutic Meal Support® and Therapeutic Movement Support®, Guided Grocery Shopping, Coached Cooking and more.
If you or someone you care about could benefit from additional support, our team is here to help!
Reach out to learn more about our services at Van Dusen Nutrition.